The Big Picture: My Aha Moment
There is a picture of me at two years old. I was an adorable baby, I must say–curly brown hair with big eyes to match, long eyelashes, little gold earrings shimmering in my lobes, a bright smile, and chubby cheeks which seemed to beg, “Pinch me!” I was a little princess, and to this day, I look back at that picture and consider it one of the best pictures ever taken of me.
As I grew up, my features remained almost the same, but not in that adorable little kid sort of way (At least, that’s how I felt). My curly brown hair was frustrating, and my bright smile didn’t seem so bright as I became more aware of the chubbiness that spread from my pinchable cheeks to the rest of my body.
I had always been a little bigger than all of my friends. I remember a classmate in elementary school asking me, “Why are you so big?” I didn’t think much of it at the time, but it must have made an impact on me because I still remember that comment nearly 13 years later.
There is a picture of me at 16 years old. It was taken at a party the night of my junior prom. I’m wearing a royal blue dress with pearls strung around my neck and those same little gold studs in my ears. But what stood out the most when I looked at that photo was my body. I wasn’t just “chubby” anymore, I was heavy–heavier than the other four girls with me in the picture. It may have been prom night, but I didn’t feel beautiful.
I guess you could say that was my “ah-ha” moment. Seeing those photos made it hit me–I wasn’t happy in my own skin. So I decided to get up and do something about my weight.
My mom taught me exercises I could do in my room, which made me more comfortable than working out in front of others. Getting motivated to exercise each day wasn’t easy, but the hardest part was giving up junk food cold turkey. All those buttery, sugary, fried indulgences went bye-bye in a blink of an eye. Sure, I “fell off the wagon” once or twice (Three words: The Cheesecake Factory). And, you know what? That’s okay. If I didn’t indulge, my junk food withdrawal might have driven me crazy! But thanks to the support I got from my family and friends, a little bit of determination, and a lot of patience, I always got back on track.
There’s a picture of me at 18 years old. It was taken at a party the night of my senior prom. This time, I’m sporting a purple dress with matching bracelets and my trusty little gold earrings. There was one big difference, though–my body. In the year between my junior and senior proms, I had lost about 40 pounds. That night, I was radiating from the inside out because I was finally happy in my skin.
Since I started my journey, I’ve lost about 60 pounds. I’m not a size two (and never will be) but I’m fine with that. Size doesn’t determine beauty; confidence and learning to love your body does.
Have you ever had an “a-ha” moment that led to healthy changes?